Friends with benefits.
And you’re sad.
You tell him that’s fine, makes sense,
but you hope he’ll sense the pain tucked deep within your words and comfort you.
He won’t.
He’s not where you are.
He does not feel what you feel.
And it should be true when you say that’s fine, makes sense,
Because it does.
Its been three weeks but somehow friends with benefits feels like an insult.
You’ve agreed to these terms, but somehow getting the answer
you knew was left in the air
for you to find on your own,
feels like another break in your ever affected heart.
Why do you always make moments more than what they are?
You remember every kiss, conversation, touch, laugh.
You allow yourself to believe that what you feel and what they feel is the same.
But it never is.
And you never learn.
Friends with benefits seems to be where you live.
Where you’ve resided for many years
Perhaps where your zip code will always remain.
So you tell him, like you’ve told the others, that’s fine, makes sense.
Because it does.
But a new zip code
To reside in
On your own terms,
is something you’ve done before
And something you hope to one day
do again.
Featured Image Credit: JLC Imagery