Hey. Hey you. I have something incredibly important that I want to tell you: You are the only person who gets to be you.
Having learned this lesson personally, multiple times, please take a second to realize that your family, friends, significant others and pets don’t get to live your life. Not your brother, your sister, your father, your son or your daughter. Only you get to do that.
Of course, they can certainly help direct your spirit where they feel you would be at your best.
But ultimately, you were placed here for a reason: To be loved and to be YOU.
We are living in an unprecedented time. Because life expectancy is at one of its highest heights in recorded history, we are in a period of human existence that features four to five generations of people—the Silent Generation, Baby Boomers, Generation X, Generation Y (Millennials) and Generation Z—all living together under the same earthly roof.
It’s no secret (now that we are in the year 2020) that conflict is happening between these generations of people. Deep-rooted family trauma, unhealthy people-pleasing, tragically high suicide rates and uncountable addictions are some of the major undercurrents that are happening at this very moment.
Take, for instance, the way that the Silent Generation sees the world is drastically different than the way Generation Y sees the world. On the other end of the spectrum, we have Generation Z trying to push us into the future with more technology and a more fair world, whereas older generations like the Baby Boomers and Generation X are standing their ground on their wisdom, what they have learned over the years and old habits of how the world really works.
The societal pressure to achieve unreachable standards has many of us searching for validation in so many wrong places where we will never truly find it.
Too many people are letting others around them live thei lives for them. It appears that a vast majority of us today are wounded, hurting and putting a lot of weight into what others think of us instead of what we think of ourselves.
If you fall into the latter category, fear not. Sometimes this is brought upon by relatives from different generations. Sometimes it is friends who are projecting their fears and their pain on you so they don’t have to deal with it. On the opposite hand, we can dig our own holes too. Nonetheless, it’s time to take a long look in the mirror and listen to our gut.
We were given the gift of self-love by something out of our control. I call this my Creator and my God, you can call it whatever you wish so that it helps you take care of yourself. Of all methods I have used for self-improvement, nothing has scratched the surface of what faith has done.
Maybe you already know these things—To live for yourself as opposed to someone else controlling your decisions and your fate in life. Maybe you forgot how to be you. Or, perhaps you’ve gotten into a habit of letting other people decide things for you. That habit needs to stop today.
When you lay your head on your pillow at night, what you have left at the end of the day is yourself. I urge you to look in the mirror and try to talk to yourself. Pump yourself up or yell out loud. Write down what you’re going to do today to live your life on a piece of paper. Call someone you love or trust; someone who has your back no matter what. Tell them that you are going to live your life and not someone else’s.
I say all these things because I have learned this the hard way. Only you get to be you. It’s time to make a decision for you and your future. You don’t have to buy into someone else’s expectation of what you should be. They aren’t you. That comparison is truly robbing you of self joy.
So please, do not allow someone else to live your life for you because they don’t get to make your decisions or even be you.
Featured Image Credit: Andrea Vehige